Archive for the ‘Sleep’ Category

2018 is here and I’m tired.

Monday, February 12th, 2018



It's 2018.  February 12th, 2018 to be exact.  I have arrived to work 10 minutes late.. My morning was spent trying to deny the fact that it was Monday and I yet again got lost in Facepage.  I jumped out of bed at 9:09AM, ran for the shower and out the door by 925AM.  Warmed up the truck and raced to work doing 80, to still arrive at 9:40AM.

Why am I rambling about my morning?

I came to the realization this weekend, that I am tired.  Deeply tired… like all I want to do is sit on the couch and vegitate, sit on the xbox and vegitate or sleep.  (granted all 3 things weith my wife around, because you know… I like her and all).  I'm not depressed.  I've been there, done that, bought the t-shirt and the bumper sticker is in the mail.  I know how that feels, how achy I get, how run down I get, how I can never seem to catch my breath… So I get and understand the feeling of depression.  This isn't it.  

After spending time with my Personal/Professional Development Coach, I was presented with some great ideas.  Some things that I can do to move my passions forward.  Later that day I had a great brain-ideasplosion about it.  Had some awesome ideas… had gumption… then I got near the couch… and that was that.  No church, no playing iwth the kids, no growth… just… sitting there passing the time.  Wasting what was a perfect opportunity to make things happen.  I even put off fixing the sink until my wife asked me to fix it.  Went to Home Depot, got the parts I needed, went to Walmart… ended up buying my wife a few gifts… and then.. went home.  Fixed the sink and then?  and then?  Plopped my big butt back on the couch and finished out the night there.  Went to bed and here I am.

See, I work a lot… at times, I feel like it's all I ever do.50+ hour weeks are normal… I have been working this way for at least 6 years, if not more.  I actually averaged 13 hours per week in overtime.  I have worked as many as 105 hours in a week and I cannot remember the last time I worked only 40.  I know it has happened, but I think it was when I took time off… No wait…  I always get called.  Interesting fact though… This was the first weekend in a few months where I was not called at least once.  So what did I do with all this free time?  Oh yeah, as I said before, I sat my big butt on the couch.

I want the tired to stop.  I am sitting at my desk… tired… wanting to take a nap… Anyone asks me how I am doing… I answer "tired".  My dad makes jokes about it.. but honestly, I just feel like I can't ever catch up on sleep.  Something has to change…


Soooo Middle Earth…

Thursday, March 21st, 2013

So “The Hobbit” came home yesterday from the grocery store… and for the first time in a long while we sat down as a family to watch a movie.  Lights were off, volume was turned up… Nachos were had… Life seemed pretty darn good.  I even managed to sneak in a VMWare tools upgrade in for one of my company’s clients.  All from the comfort of my living room.  I even told my boss yesterday that I was going to sleep in today which he was completely cool with… Yeah… I was going to communicate this to my wife, but she has NOT been feeling well and she didn’t sleep for squat the night before.  So I dragged myself out of bed, to find that my youngest son, who was woken up 3 times had missed his bus because he kept going back to sleep.  I don’t know why that ticks me off so bad.  It throws my morning way off.  He gets in trouble and he doesn’t seem to care.  He has an alarm, people wake him up… he goes back to bed.




This is the same kid, that prays with authority when we pray as a family.  The boy has an anointing..  He’s just… I can’t explain it… The kid is just belligerent chaos…  I pray for him all the time… that he finds his way… I don’t get it.

No new dreams last night… I was out cold.


Uhhh… It’s still early in my day…   I have more to ramble on about… Most of it centered around my music.  TTYL




Wow… You speak fluent Spanglish?

Tuesday, March 19th, 2013

I had no idea how to title this one.  So many things to talk about.  Its a bit hard to narrow it down to something simple.

Lets start with my overnight… So after going to bed at 1 AM, I woke up some time in the middle of the night feeling like I was suffocating… Which usually means that the holes in my mask are covered… (I.e. The exhaust holes in my Bi-pap mask) They weren’t I just felt that I couldn’t catch my breath… then I realized that my Bi-Pap wasn’t acting right.  I fiddled with it for a little bit and realized that it was jacked.  It was barely pushing air and the inhale and the exhale were the same weak pressure.  Well crap… So I reached under my bed and grabbed what I call the “Travel” bipap and hooked it up.  I thought my head was going to pop… the pressure just seemed so high… but in actuality it was where it was supposed to be.  Wow… So today, though I am tired, I feel like my brain actually works.  I can form a clear thought .. which would explain why I have been so run down for the past month.  I haven’t been sleeping well AT ALL and have wondered several things…  So yeah…

Then today I get a text from a friend about something I said… I felt bad.. I wasn’t trying to start anything… aaaaaaaaaand that’s almost all I have on the subject… other than I hope that my Bi-Pap being messed up explains my dreams over the past month….   I really hope it does.  There’s more that I worry about because of it… but I will have to discuss with a friend of mine.

Also, since I changed my theme….. as the last one broke when WP upgraded… I lost all my counters… so I had to install a new one.  That’s done…

Currently running a post-lunch headache…. and Ibuprofen has been had.

So, to end on a high note… Last night, I got home from work, I grabbed my Beansie and took her out to dinner.  1 mini-cheese pizza and a doughnut… She’s high maintenance… let me tell ya!  🙂  I love my Beans… I got her home and Granny whisked her away for a sleep over… But not after Mommy and Daddy got one more round of happy birthday in…